Dear money, please come to me

Ok, I'll take my time to talk about money.

Long story short, I'm broke. And there are things I want to buy but can't because I got to save some money too.

Clothes are what I've been feeling most needy now. I don't have much variety of them, actually if you look at my closet, it's quite sad.
No one could have a good image wearing only those clothes.

And there's also my stuff I wanted to buy cause they make me happy. 
A new stuffed toy, a lip gloss, a black and simple backpack, and music (including CDs). 

For now I'll just keep holding myself back and pay attention  to my accounts.

No place for me in here

I've been nothing.

I try to read,  but I can't.
I try to listen to music, but I can't.
I try to connect with anything, but I can't.

I can't feel anything. Sometimes I get euphoric and all smiles, but it only lasts about one hour, then I'm back at being empty.

What I really need is to be alone. Not for some hours in somewhere special, but I need my own house. Somewhere where I can do my stuff slowly and gradually feel like I'm growing up.
I need it. I need my own place.

Meanwhile, I guess surviving it's all I can do.